Most things at the beach are pretty flexible. We saw a guy in a sports coat, we saw people in jeans or shorts. I would say if you want to dress up then its a nice place to do it, but I wouldn't say you have to.
My group went twice and both times we dressed very casual and felt comfortable there.
Colington Cafe is one of the outer banks best restaurants in really lovely home, tucked away in the trees of Colington island. While they don't seem to have a strict dress code, I think it only respectful to dress appropriately for such a nice restaurant. Jeans and tshirts are inappropriate, a nice collared polo or better yet, a button down shirt with slacks for the men, and a similar level of dress for the women. Nothing formal, no suit, but nothing too casual either. It's one of our very favorite restaurants, enjoy!
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